Lubrication

Certain things drive your inspiration, compulsion and obsession. As soon as I had seen the film it was on the hit list, I just had to go. Do you remember it? John Travolta and Olivia Newton John, they were the business! Young Johnny was getting up everything - what a mover. Having visited Crete and Rhodes I was rather sceptical about the development of climbing on the mainland but unlike the islands, with the exception of Kalymoss,( and very recently ,Crete) rapid progress is being made.

But it's not all rock jocking, not with the huge number of mountains to be explored. Needless to say there will be the Maol Chuaichs in profusion but there are also plenty of Bidein a Choire Sheasgaichs as well.The best known of these and of course the highest at 9,500 ft is the throne of Zeus (well his holiday cottage then); Mt Olympus. From the town of Litochoro, almost on the coast, Olympus rises dramatically to its snowy summit a sharp contrast to the 95F degree beeches of the Aegean; covered with overweight adenoidal typists from Wapping, their cadaverously white purulent skin rapidly mimicking the snows of the mountain as the evening sun turns it a brilliant pink.

The recommended three day ascent circuit from Prionia via two or three refuges can be done in a day and it's great fun. The summit ridges give tremendous and exposed scrambling over the three high points to Mitikas -the main top. Then it's downhill all the way from there - well almost, ok so there's some more uphill but not much, well not too much.

And there's nobody else about. Two of the refuges don't open until later in the year, there are some awkward snowfields to cross so it's a nice quiet little mountain until "The Season" begins. The other advantage of being there 'early' is the flowers. Greece is a botanist's and for that matter an entomologist's paradise. The carpets of flowers are so varied and sweet smelling, with so many different species apparently delicate but obviously extremely hardy to survive the contrasts of temperature. The butterflies and moths, beetles of every colour and numerous other invertebrates add to the pleasure. Mind you there is some kind of mini helicopter with a sting like a punch from Lennox Lewis that are a regular pain in the botty (or wherever they sting you).

On then to the Brimham of Greece, Meteora. A huge area of formidable conglomerate towers some with Monasteries perched on top. Yes Monasteries - England has got its Morris Dancers, Greece has got its Monks and they live in the Monasteries or rather they don't, they conduct their business from the Monasteries. This is tourist country by the coach load. In days gone by the Monks traded in sackcloth, gruel mixture and the simple things in life but this is the 21st century, things have changed. Now they are into sex (with each other of course) and drugs and rock 'n roll. Their highly priced genuine Greek, made in Taiwan, artefacts sold by the container load to the afore mentioned typists now pay for their 'Habits'. "It's business man - nothing personal".

The climbing? - that is personal, real personal, frightening. Don't, just don't, do the classic 5s.Do the 6s and 7s, they've got bolts here and there - good bolts. The 70s and 80s routes are statements of East German ethics. Crazy men, brilliant but crazy. Brave but stupid. It doesn't take long to realise how crap it all really is, so soon you will be on your way to proper climbing areas of lovely limestone.

The Varasova massif drops down to the sea on the South coast at Krioneri.This is THE ultimate roadside crag. Drive to the secluded beach, rough camp on the grass two meters from the sea and the crags are across the road a minute away. For this you get to either 2/3 pitch 'sports routes' or with slightly more effort bolted/trad up-to-the-top routes. If you really want to put some effort in 10-20 mins gets you to the bottom of some of the 600 metre super routes. So, lower off the sports routes or rap the trad routes, cool off in the sea 20 seconds away or take a dip in the crystal clear fresh water stream that flows out from under the cliff and then stroll along to the solitary Taverna further down the beach. It's cooled down now to what, 28 C, sit a while, contemplate the ocean, wonder why you go to Ravenscar on a blustery April evening. (and then to The Wainstones Hotel at £2.20 a friggin pint).

There's a ferry across to the Peloponissos and on the North West tip of this pseudo island lies the delightful area of Kalogria. If you are happy on 8b+ power routes it's no doubt a great place to climb. But this is Yiannis Torelis' manor and he's one mean dude. He hurts people. Not directly of course. Via his ridiculously hard routes. It hurts to even look at them. This is the man that makes Conan the Destroyer look like Robin Cook (and, let's face it, what could possibly be worse?) So when you've done everything, hit the back roads heading south.

The Easterly tip of the Peloponissos is a climbing paradise. Perfect weather, perfect rock, perfect coast, perfect this perfect that...perfect. Like so many esoteric destinations there is so much rock here, yes you've guessed, perfect rock and so much potential. Some of this potential has been tapped - on the more accessible and obvious crags. In the last couple of years Jim Titt and Inge Zaczek have put up and equipped a few hundred routes. There are mountain crags, sea cliffs, gorges, outcrops and huge faces. The majority of the routes/pitches are bolted - with excellent glued in bolts and rap/lower off points. Jim has designed, developed, tested and manufactured his own breed of bolts/hangers and they are far superior to your Petzl generic equivalent. Some of the routes are exceptional - as good as you get anywhere in the world. And the whole area is a superb alternative to the regular Costa Del Climbing Wall scene.

There are of course other climbing areas in Greece. The wild and very remote Gamilla in the North apparently offers some exceptional adventures, The Talgetos range in the deep South promises more sun kissed rock than even Cooks Crags can offer. In between lurk partly developed mysterious areas just waiting for....YOU.

To summarise these ancient lands; unless you have a death wish or worse, fancy morris dancing with Hornyopolus the over friendly Monk; give Meteora a miss and head for the Limestone and have some fun in the sun.

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Lubrication

Christopher Lane